Feelings

I didn't know what else to call this post...it isn't very descriptive, and I guess I could say that what I'm feeling right now isn't easily described either.

I'm engaged officiallly now, and the wedding is in 2 and 1/2 months. I can't wait until it is here and over. The stress and pressure of these last months is maddening. It will be nice to feel like I can breath again. Don't get me wrong, the planning is a ton of fun! It is simply the rest of the worries and struggles that come along with being engaged are wearing on me.

I guess that is why all the rest of what I'm feeling is dragging me down more...things that I'm usually able to deal with, are all just rubbing me the wrong way. It's so hard because I feel trapped. I don't know how to express what I'm feeling, and I wish I did. I'm torn as well, because I know I shouldn't complain...but I don't know what other way to get this off my chest.

Life is so full of drama it seems. Leaving Florida didn't take that away, and neither did getting engaged. It still followed and has simply taken a different form...and is working double hard to pull me down. If it isn't one thing, it is another. I guess the key is learning how to not let it affect you at all...and I'm definitely not at that point yet.

I feel that I'm in uncharted territory and that I've stumbled. Few times, and even lost my way. At least the Lord is there...I'm so grateful for that. There is Another feeling....gratitude for the blessing of my Savior and the atonement. What a miracle in my existence.

Man...I feel so scattered brained...this is the most random post.

Let us just say, I'm still figuring out the journey. Falling in love didn't end my problems or stop the lessons coming my way. I simply have new ones, and need do find out how to handle them soon.

Somtin Girl